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Approaching women can be very difficult. Maybe you recognize the following? You are in a club, bar or a regular store while shopping and you see an incredible girl walking past. You want to approach her and talk to her but fear is taking over. What do I have to say? What if it isn't going well?
Approach anxiety is the most common feeling among men, even the best guys, feel it before they approach a girl. You tense up, you feel an enormous amount of pressure or anxiety and you complete shutdown. This feeling comes from our cave man times and its purpose is/was purely evolutionary.
Maybe there were only a few women in the tribe who could bear children and when you blew it the changes of reproduction are gone.
An very good way to overcome this feeling is to do warm-up sets. This means that you talk to a lot of girls just for the sake of talking and get a good feeling. As a result you will probably see that it isn't scary or anything.
The second thing we can use is the so called '3 second rule'. This rule simply states that when you see someone you want to talk to you go. Without thinking what so ever. This way you are less likely to frees up and miss the girl of your dreams.
This little 'trick' can make your life a bit easier.
Walking up to a girl can be quite scary, especially when you are standing still. It can be easier when you are on the move. Just start walking around in the club, this way it can be much easier to walk up to the girl you want to speak.
So, you walked up to the girl and now you have to say something. When you are confident enough you can be honest and direct and say what you want or think.
You could use something like the following and when you add a little smile you might be surprised with the response you get.
'Hi, I saw you from up there and I had to talk to you. You look very good tonight.'
But for a lot of guys this is already a bit much. The next you could do is talk to her like if you know her for ages. Be a bit close to her so it feels more natural that you talk to her instead of walking up to her and use something that stands out to start the conversation.
Jeez, this music very loud!
Hi, were talking about …. and I need a female opinion.
I am looking for a place to get a drink, any ideas?
Having fun is also a very important, being with a fun, energetic, enthusiastic group helps creating an good environment for people to talk with you. When you are having fun and you let someone else join you they will probably love you for it! Everyone wants to have fun when they are going out.
During the day
Talking to people during the day is different than when you are going out. Take it a bit slow but still be fun and spontaneous. Talk to her like the way you want people to talk with you.
When you see someone say something about something in the neighborhood or when you feel good you could be a more direct.
Hi, I am on my way to a friend, but I saw you standing here and I have to say I really like your smile!
Approaching her in broad daylight will give you some bonus points already, because it doesn’t happen too much to her. But she's probably doing something as well so exchange a few words and phone numbers to setup a next meeting.